If loving you is all that means to me

We were... "You and Me"

How do I say goodbye to someone I never really had?

Why do my tears fall so endlessly for someone who was never really mine?

Why is it I miss someone I was never really with?

And why do I love someone whose love was never really mine?

Still.. I believe you had your heart for me too.

But you never really tell. You're never really sure.

I don't know..

or maybe I'm just fooling myself.

So there.. I really don't have reason to hate you.

It's just, realizing that I can't have you makes me love you even more.

...and here by now, really.. I'm missing you too much.

Not a Poem

"hating me..?"

Where's my baby?
I can't see him anymore
Where's the smile I used to adore
Where did you hide it

Why can't you understand that I can go somewhere without you
I just don't want to.
It would just go wrong with this feeling inside
If you want me to kill it
Go do it yourself
Don't ask me how

And I do hate you honey
But I still love you
Wow now I sound like a song

Yea.. this is not a poem, song whatsoever
It's just me speaking
Speaking my heart out

The Last Seconds, The Last Thoughts

2009

Last year,

He was still the one who would spend time with me and laugh with me.

He would be the one who share snacks and songs with me. Who would share the lonely path with me.

Casual.

But now, everything is just not the same. My feelings screwed my life. He and I will never be the same anymore. I wouldn't want to be alone with him anymore. Can't lie.. I'd want.. I just really shouldn't.

I guessed after counting the last seconds, I would not want to see him again. But hey.. I've been so lost. I wouldn't like to lose even more..

"I see you dear, happy. So there you go, having fun with your life. And I will too :) And I know you will be happy seeing me happy."

"And I'm letting you go... Finally."

I wont ask him to take care. Because he will. "I'm asking you to stay Happy :)"

I know people say that talk is cheap. ..but I don't care.

I know how valuable my "I love you" is :)

BYE dear..

I love you.

2010